A diary of the week’s accounts, with The LIVE Trust, a soft drink and a bus pass
Friday Budget: What a Punk Spends on a London Gig, and Why One Pound on an Arena Ticket Makes Me Weep
A diary of the week’s accounts, with The LIVE Trust, a soft drink and a bus pass
By Siobhan O'Donnell, London punk rocker and diarist
Friday, Accounts Night
Dear diary, it is Friday and I have done the accounts. Every week I write my expenses on the back of an envelope, and every week the envelope laughs. This week the line items are: one soft drink, one door fee at a small venue, two bus fares, one packet of crisps and a pencil. I bought none of these with joy.
The money question is on my mind because of the City AM piece on the V&A show, which says a 200,000 pound allocation from The LIVE Trust, funded partly by a one pound levy on shows with over 5,000 capacity, has helped venues upgrade infrastructure.
One Pound
One pound. I looked at that figure for a long time. A big show with more than 5,000 people in it adds a pound to the ticket and a smaller room gets a new fire door or a better sound desk. It is the sort of idea that sounds obvious once someone has done it, like the umbrella.
I do not know how much has been raised in total, and the article gives only the 200,000 pound figure. I would like to know more. If you have the accounts, send them over.
Which Brings Me to December
The Sex Pistols’ London shows are at the Brixton Academy and the Eventim Apollo, as Official Charts lists. I do not know whether they count as above the 5,000 threshold, because I have not seen the capacity figures and the article does not say. I would not wish to guess about which levy applies to which room.
I will say that if the levy applies, it is a splendid way for a fifty-year-old noise to help the next one.
My Own Budget
A week of small gigs costs me about the same as a week of oat milk. I will not give figures because you would judge me. But the shape of it is this: if I go to one big show a year, I can afford about twelve small ones, and I get more out of the twelve.
I am not saying you should not go to the big show. I am saying you should go to the big show and then go to the small room next door the following week.
Why It Matters
Marcus Harris, the promoter at The Lexington, called the sector a “collapsing ecosystem” in the City AM article. An ecosystem is a thing where the big animals depend on the small ones, and the small ones depend on the mud. I am the mud.
If you want a single sentence for the lot, it is Beverley Whitrick’s: “use them or lose them.”
The Practical Bit
Check the Music Venue Trust for your nearest grassroots venue, check the venue’s own page for the door price, and go early enough to see the first band. The first band is always the one who worked hardest to be there.
I will not tell you which gig to go to. I will tell you that the toilet doors are not what they were.
Lights Out
I am putting the envelope in the bin. Tomorrow I will start another. It will say the same thing, and I will go to another gig.
That is the system. It is a bad system, and it is mine.
Receipts
I keep my receipts in a biscuit tin that once held shortbread. It now holds the proof that I am a person of limited means and unlimited enthusiasm. When I am rich and famous I will put the tin on display at the V&A, next to the toilet.
Until then, the tin goes under the bed, where it has company.
A Note for Next Week
Next week I will do the same sums for a gig in a bigger room, and then I will compare. I suspect the bigger room will cost more, sound cleaner and leave me feeling less. I will report back, with a pencil.
Please do not send me your own receipts. I have enough.
What I Read On the Night Bus
Between gigs I read the comic papers, because somebody has to. This week the big joke was property: Manila News on slow condo sales in Cebu, the London Prat on retirees asked for character references (it is at https://prat.uk/cebu-estate-agents-demand-character-references/) and Bohiney on a realtor with unsellable beachfront listings. Exaggeration all the way down, but anchored to a real market story. More at prat.uk and bohiney.com.
Note: Philippine authorities are examining unproven allegations about Thomas Markle Sr., who lived in Cebu until earlier this year, as GMA News and the Guardian have reported. No charges have been filed. Child protection is a serious matter; the jokes here are about a property market and the paperwork.
Proper satire is still the best noise in London: try The Daily Squib, and the rest of the lot at NewsThump, NewsBiscuit and The Daily Squib.
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/cebu-realtor-cant-sell-beachfront-listings/