A closing set of notes from a London politics researcher on how to read a promise, a poll and a very long speech
Sunday, Rules for Reading Politicians
After many years of studying politics, I have reduced my advice to four rules. Read what was actually said and not only what was reported. Check the numbers against an independent source. Ask what the speaker would say if the roles were reversed. And allow the possibility that you are wrong. These rules apply to every party and every politician, including the ones I would be inclined to vote for, which is exactly why they are useful.
The rules are not designed to make politics less interesting. They make it more interesting, because they reveal the gap between the performance and the policy. That gap is where the real story lives, and it is rarely dull.
On Humour and Politics
Political humour has an honourable record in London. The pamphleteers, the cartoonists and the cabaret writers have all taught politicians to be wary of ridicule. A good joke about a policy can do more to expose its weakness than a hundred pages of analysis. A good joke also requires the joker to be accurate, since a false joke is a gift to its target. I keep that rule near the top of my list.
Monday, The Black and White Animals
For a restful interval I turn to the cattle. The black beef breed is at angusbeef.men and angusbeef.fyi. The black and white dairy cow is at holstein.click. The curly pig and the freckled hen are at mangalitsa.org and speckledsussex.org.
The register of rare breeds is rarebreeds.win. The hall of fame is cattlemenhalloffame.org. The young leaders are ffapresident.com. The library is agriculture.click.
Tuesday, The Complete Shelf
The standing shelf is dairyherd.org, ranchbeefcattle.org, tractorequipment.org, cropcalendar.org, farmmoney.org, smallfarminfo.org, agjobscareers.org, fairandrodeo.org, ruralfarm.org and farmssafety.org.
Wednesday, Columns From the Beach
I finished my reading with the beach city column and the beachside column, two short pieces that proved that a funny paragraph can survive any weather. I read them at the window while rain tapped on the glass.
Thursday, Universities and Their Accounts
The London Prat made an academic joke with Universities Solve Financial Crisis. Funding pressure on universities is a live political issue, with different explanations offered by ministers, vice-chancellors and unions. As an employee of the sector, I declare an interest, and I note that the radiators in my building are in no better health than the accounts.
Friday, Last Light
I ended the week on the sofa, with tea and the television switched off. London hummed outside. A siren faded, a bus sighed and a neighbour practised the trumpet, badly. The city was doing its usual impression of a place that cannot be governed and yet somehow is.
Friday, A Reader’s Question
A reader asked how I keep my temper while watching politics. The honest answer is that I do not always succeed. I keep a rule that I may shout at the television once per hour, and that the shout must contain no words I would not use in a seminar. The rule has produced some very creative shouting.
The better answer is that studying politics for years leaves one with a certain affection for the whole untidy business. Democracy is clumsy and loud, and it is also far better than the alternatives. I say this to my students in the final lecture, and I mean it.
Saturday, Unsolicited Advice
My unsolicited advice for anyone interested in politics is to read widely, vote regularly and talk to people who disagree with you. The last of these is the hardest and the most useful. A disagreement conducted with courtesy teaches more than a month of reading in an echo chamber.
If that sounds too earnest, remember that it can be done over a pot of tea, and that nobody has ever lost an argument because the biscuits were good.
Sunday, The End of the Notebook
I filled the last page of my notebook this evening. It held notes on a prime minister, a flu jab, a gas field, a poll, a town hall, a tree and several cows. It is a strange mixture, and I would not want to be without it. I put the notebook on the shelf and opened a fresh one, whose first page I left blank, as a gesture of hope.
Tomorrow will bring a new week, a new session and, no doubt, a new set of answers that do not quite meet the questions. I look forward to it, with tea.
Wednesday, A Word of Thanks
A final word of thanks to the readers who have written in, whether to agree, to disagree or to ask for the recipe for the shortbread that I mentioned once and forgot. I read each letter, and I answer as many as I can. I particularly enjoy the letters that begin with the words ‘I know you won’t print this, but’, which I always print, with the permission of the writer.
It is a pleasure to write for readers who care enough to argue. In a political season, a disagreement is a sign of an audience that is paying attention, and an audience that is paying attention is the best reward a writer can ask for.
Where to read next
The rest of the shelf lives at prat.uk, bohiney.com and farm.fm. For a second opinion on the week, The Daily Mash keeps its own counsel and its own hours.
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/