Cotswold villages, autumn colour and a friendly warning for American visitors about discussing politics in the pub
Escape Plans
Sooner or later every visitor to London wants to leave it. Not forever, you understand, but for a day. The city is wonderful, but it is also loud, crowded and designed by a committee of angry pigeons. The countryside is only a train ride away, and a day trip is the best way to see another side of Britain. This guide will help you plan one without ending up at a level crossing at midnight.
Start with National Rail at nationalrail.co.uk, which covers timetables and tickets for train journeys across the country. Check the times before you go, and check them again at the station. Services change, engineering works happen and trains have a mind of their own.
The Cotswolds in Autumn
The Cotswolds are the picture-postcard favourite, with honey-coloured villages, rolling hills and a pub at every corner. A Lady in London has written up 24 hours in the Cotswolds in autumn, which is a handy guide if you want to stay overnight and make a proper trip of it. Getting there can involve a train and a bus or taxi, so plan ahead.
Other Countryside Ideas
If you fancy something closer, London Inside has a regular round-up of what to do near the city, including its what’s on this weekend listing. And Londonist has a good history feature on the Thames bridges that ended up in Africa, which is not a day trip but is a rather good story for the train.
Some of the best countryside is within a short journey of the capital. The Royal Parks run beautiful open spaces inside London, at royalparks.org.uk, and they are the best free substitute for a country walk. If you want to do it properly, the National Trust looks after many houses and landscapes, at nationaltrust.org.uk.
What Is a Farm Shop?
You will see signs for farm shops along English roads. These are small stores that sell local produce, such as eggs, cheese, bread, chutney and sausages, often from the farm next door. They are lovely, a little pricey and a good way to buy a present without going near a gift shop. If you want to understand the work behind them, rural farm is a gentle introduction.
The trade papers of the farming world, which tell you what farmers are actually worried about, are collected at farm press. If you plan to chat to a farmer, reading a few headlines will help. Be warned that the first thing a farmer will say is that the weather is wrong.
A Friendly Word for American Visitors
Many of our visitors come from the United States, and we are delighted to see you. Here is some gentle advice for the village pub. Do not begin a conversation by asking what people think of the election. In the American farm world there are two camps, farmer Republican and farmer Democrat, and they get along fine in person because they have to share a gate. In an English village pub, a political argument tends to end with the landlord asking everyone to calm down and offering a packet of crisps.
Instead, talk about the weather, the quality of the beer and the state of the road. These subjects are universal and endlessly rewarding. If you feel unable to resist, a remark about the price of diesel will be received with a nod.
Walking Safely
Public footpaths cross farmland across England, and walkers are welcome as long as they follow the Countryside Code. Shut gates behind you. Keep dogs under control around livestock. Stay on the path, and leave no litter. The UK government has the official code and further guidance at gov.uk. Wear proper shoes, because country mud is a different animal from London mud and it holds a grudge.
A Small Note on the Weather
The English countryside changes by the hour. Pack a waterproof, even if the sky is blue. In farm.FM’s report on a different part of the world, a story about how an early freeze destroyed the apple harvest offers a useful warning: the weather is in charge, and you are a guest. Dress accordingly.
Where to Learn More
If you fall in love with the countryside, you can read the news and guides at agriculture news and guides, and the humour of the countryside is gathered at farm.FM. The London Prat also keeps a friendly record of the nation’s habits, including its guide to what a prat actually is, which you will need if anyone calls you one.
Five Quick Tips
- Book trains and accommodation ahead, especially at weekends.
- Wear proper shoes and carry a waterproof.
- Close gates, keep dogs on a lead and take your litter home.
- Avoid election arguments in the village pub.
- Buy something from a farm shop, and say thank you.
Home Again
By nightfall you will be back in London, muddy and satisfied, having seen a different version of Britain from the one on the Tube map. For more good-humoured guidance, try Bohiney, The London Prat and farm.FM. They will not get you a train, but they might get you a smile.
For a last laugh, there is The Daily Mash.
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/